I feel so UN-prepared and IN-adequate for what lies ahead!!
The thoughts that have crept into my mind include, but are not limited to:
- We still need a baby dresser.
- We still have to find (and afford) a vehicle that all three of us can fit in.
- I'm not good mother material.
- How am I going to organize all our stuff in a 1 bedroom apartment?
- I don't want to add to my kid's issues because of my own set of issues.
- Can I really do this?
I like being prepared and organized. I like having the answers to my questions, the solutions to my problems. And right now, there are so many aspects of this "having a kid" thing that are un-answered, un-solved, un-prepared, and un-organized.
This morning, however, I found great comfort in God's Word.
First, I read from Proverbs 24 (since today is the 24th):
"Through wisdom is a house builded; and by understanding it is established: And by knowledge shall the chambers be filled with all precious and pleasant riches." -Proverbs 24:3-4Then, God, in His wisdom, reminded me of another passage:
"Except the LORD build the house, they labor in vain that build it: except the LORD keep the city, the watchman waketh but in vain. It is vain for you to rise up early, to sit up late, to eat the bread of sorrows: for so he giveth his beloved sleep." -Psalms 127:1-2Yes, we have needs and inadequacies. But if we could do it all on our own, why would we need God? Our needs, our inadequacies should point us to the strength and wisdom of our LORD. He has to be the one to do it, or else our homes will be built on vanity; they would be built on sand and not on the Solid Rock (cf. Matthew 7:24-27).
Do I have any idea how everything is going to get done before the baby arrives or how it will all be paid or provided for? Nope.
Do I have the answers to every parenting problem that will come about? Nope.
And you know what? That's okay. Yes, I can and will be searching God's Word for answers and will (hopefully) be remembering to pray for God's guidance. But I don't have to have all the answers right now.
Red Beard and I need to take this situation one day at a time, one step at a time, relying on God's wisdom to build our home.
What are you building your home on? Your own inadequacy or on the Lord? ~Mrs. D.